A Journey To Home: What I've Been Learning

It's been a while

I've been learning that opportunities slip away when you don't chase them, make time for them, sacrifice for them.

I really regret all the nights after work this summer that I went and sat down and watched TV instead of working Callie. I felt like I didn't have the knowledge I needed to train her, so I did nothing at all. And now that I've decided that it is worth the hardship, it's winter and I don't have the daylight to ride her in. That is an opportunity I'll never have again. I will train her next year and she will flourish.

Falling Isn't Failing

God has given me freedom this summer. Freedom from being the "super-Christian" that I've always been called and I've felt the pressure to attain. Freedom from having to read my Bible every day or pray for hours at a time. My relationship with God is unique. No one else will relate to God in the same way, so why do I expect my relationship to look like theirs?

I spent several months without opening my Bible, without setting aside time each day to pray. God told me "If you aren't hungry for Me, then I don't want your religion". Now, I'm starting to get hungry. I don't know what dinner will look like, but I'm starting to look forward to it. I'm looking forward for my hunger to become more distinct so I know exactly what I want.

In this, I had times where I tried to have God Time on certain days, and I would not do it. I felt like I was failing, that I would never be hungry enough or be good enough to do this relationship correctly. One day I was watching Extreme Makeover; Weight Loss Edition and Chris Powell said "You can fall without failing." And a lightbulb just went on. I can pick myself up and try again, and be more prepared to succeed. I was free :)